Show-Family Guy
Peter Griffin: 3: 12: Peter is surprised to find he has had a piece of shrimp in his mouth for a week. Played for a fool: Finders Keepers: Lois Griffin: 4: 12: Lois tells Peter that he is being played for a fool, like George McFly. Nature documentary: Finders Keepers: Peter Griffin: 5: 12: Peter takes umbrage that his treasure hunt is a stupid. Peter Griffin: 3: 12: Peter is surprised to find he has had a piece of shrimp in his mouth for a week. Played for a fool: Finders Keepers: Lois Griffin: 4: 12: Lois tells Peter that he is being played for a fool, like George McFly. Nature documentary: Finders Keepers: Peter Griffin: 5: 12: Peter takes umbrage that his treasure hunt is a stupid. Peter and his friends are planning to rob Carter Pewtershmidt Peter: Alright.On a normal night in the Pewtershmidt mansion, there might be as much as $6,000,000 in the vault alone, but this Saturday is the Pewtershmidt's annual 'Bring-All-Your-Cash-And-Put-It-In-Our-Safe' party. Jul 10, 2018 - This Pin was discovered by Brandon Barclay. Discover (and save!) your own Pins on Pinterest. Peter Griffin: Must - kill - Lincoln. Start a Forum thread on this item. EP 104 - Mind Over Murder; Item id #11000. Who craps inside his pants.
Air Date-January 5th 2014
Episode 219
Some of the content in this blog post may not be suitable for a younger audience. Viewer discretion is advised.
So my first review of an adult cartoon. I feel so mature.
Either way I'm not going to beat around the bush here. I HATE Family Guy. It's the most obnoxious, annoying, irritating, stupid show on Television right now. In fact it's the first show I'm talking about on this blog that I outright hate. It's kinda like Spongebob in the sense that it started out good but went through Seasonal Rot as it went along. In fact this show was affected by Seasonal Rot way....way worse than Spongebob. At least I can still say I like Spongebob overall but I can't say the same for Family Guy. I hate it. Personally I think the Seasonal Rot began with the episode Airport '07 but I'll talk about that one later. For now we are gonna talk about Peter Problems which is a perfect showcase of most of my problems with the show. If you like Family Guy there is nothing wrong wuth that. I just hate it and now I will explain why with the episode Peter Problems.
The episode starts with annoying filler of Peter talking to a deaf co-worker at well....work. Then Peter's boss comes in and we get more pointless filler of Peter just making random noises at her. If it was funny I wouldn't mind but it's not. It's the worse type of joke. The joke that goes on way to long and comes off as obnoxious instead of funny.
By the way I just wanna point out how awesome this guy's name is.
Cherry Chevapravatdumrong.
I know Mr. Enter already said this but that is one EPIC name.
Cool name aside though Peter's boss (Who I forget the name of) tells Peter he is being promoted to Forklift Operator and that he will get a raise. We then get a cut-away gag.
Now lets talk aboit these cut-aways. In recent years it seems that these gags have just been used to fill in time and they suffer the same problem as a lot of family guy jokes. They are unfunny and obnoxious. They are also extremely overused. This particular cut-away gag involves an elephant on a bike falling into water. It got a chuckle out of me the first time I saw it I will admit but thats because of how stupid it is.
So we get a scene of Peter trying the forklift for the first time. Since he's a complete idiot he falls off of it but he gradually gets better. And by gradually I mean he can do stunts perfectly on it on only his second attempt.
Either way he goes to the bar where he meets his friends Joe and Quagmire to tell them about the forklift. However Quagmire thinks Peter is trying tell him about his PodCast(It makes more sense if you watch the episode)
We then get a cut-away gag where Peter is listing a bunch of hats for his podcast. That's it. Just Peter naming types of hats. Ha Ha Ha Ha. Funny Right. (Sarcasm.) It wasn't funny at all. It went on for to long and became very....very annoying. God I'm only a few minutes in and I'm already steaming with rage. And unlike the last three episodes I reviewed this is 22 minutes instead of 11 so that's twice the amount of crap I have to deal with. Ugh.....
Any way Quagmire and Joe see the forklift and what do they decide to do with it.
Yep. They carry around Joe (the handicaped one) on the forklift to make it look like he's walking. It's stupid. Joe's pants fall off......so that happened.
Next we get a stupid cut-away gag that's a reference to Lion King. I looked everywhere in this scene and I am certain that there is no comedy here.
We then get the worst part of this entire episode (tied with the ending). It's also the scene that put this episode into infamy. This scene is vulgar, disgusting, awful. It ticks me off that someone actually wrote this as a joke. In fact no it doesn't just tick me off. It disgust me. The scene involves a beached whale.
The people wanna try to get it back in the water so Peter comes in with his forklift and tires to put the whale back in the sea. Unfourtunetly he accidently stabs the whale.
The whale makes a very real sound of pain that is not enjoyable to listen to. Peter then lifts the whale off the ground while the lift is still stabbed inside of it and carries it over the sea. Since the lift is stuck inside the whale the whale won't come of so Peter tries to shake it off. The whale eventually dies and his body begins to fall apart. By the end it looks like this.
Disgusting. This scene last for a really long time. To long and it focuses on the whale falling apart the entire time. It just keeps going. On and on. This...this is not funny. Heck it's not even a joke. This is disgusting. It's sick to think that someone thought this could be used as comedy. You know what whoever thought that needs to be fired immedietly and never have a job on TV ever again (both live action and animation included).
I'm not joking. They even have the balls to end this scene with a pun. You know the older episodes of Family Guy while they can be vulgar would never stoop down to these levels of disgustingness. It's not funny, it's not entertaining. Whoever wrote that scene and whoever thought it was a good idea FAILED. They failed hard.
After that........thing, we cut to Peter at work. For those who don't know Peter works at a brewery. He sees a big vat of beer and bets someone he can drink it all. He uses the forklift to lift up the vat and pour the alcohol into his mouth. He passes out and causes the forklift to move forward causing it to crash through a wall into a conference room.
Peter is then quickly fired. Good. He should be. His stupidity is just putting people in harms way. I mean he should've thought this through. Whatever, we need a plot somehow.
A few weeks later at the griffin household Peter still doesn't have a job. He's to incompatent to even read a news paper.
The family now has a limited amount of cash. So much that they have to eat cheap breakfast and can't afford school pictures so the childrean are told to stand behind someone as they're getring their picture taken.
As far as I know that's not how it works. You only have to pay if you want to own the photos. However everyone gets their picture taken. No matter what (unless you were absent)
At least thats how they did it in every single school I've ever been to. But some schools may do it like this. I don't know,
And yes I do know that it was a joke. But it wasn't funny or entertaining.
Lois says she should get a job as Peter hasn't had a job lead yet. We then get a scene that actually made me laugh. I wont spoil the joke but lets just say it's kinda terrible but funny still.
It's this scene for those of you who have seen the episode.
So far thats 2 jokes I've praised. Not good. You can make up for not being funny by atleast being entertaining but......yeah not this episode. Not entertaining in the least.
So yeah Lois is getting a job at her local grocery store. We then get a cut-away with Peter in a record shop asking the owner about someone called Debussy.
And he keeps saying it over and over. Debussy Debussy Debussy.
The joke js it sounds like De Pussy but it's not funny and gets obnoxious fast.
Also Peter acts like a Sexist Douche after Lois tells him she's getting a job. Cause the idea of a women having a job that's not prostitution, being a lawyer or being a nurse is very hard to comprehend. Here's a tip. Sexism is not funny. I'm sorry I keep repeating myself but thats because the episode keeps repeating the same problem. God, I'm not even half-way through this episode yet. Already I feel like I'm about to explode.
So we cut to Lois' job interview. It actually also got a laugh out of me. I gotta give credit where credit is due.
So Lois got the job. Meaning Peter has to stay and watch the kids. Not a good idea. If i recall in the episode The Juice Is Loose (The O.J Simpson one) In one of the cut-aways it is revealed that Peter and Lois had another kid....just that Peter killed it. In that same episode he is watching over Stewie and invites his friends over. While they act like Stereotypical Teenage Girls he pays no attention to Stewie. Point is not a good idea leaving Peter alone with the Kids. Couldn't Meg do it. I mean she's a legal adult by this episode I'm pretty sure. Say what you want about Meg she is much more qualified than Peter.
We get a few jokes about Peter getting. use to being a Stay at Home Father. Not much worth mentioning except for one joke.
I TOLD YOU. I knew leaving Peter in charge would kill someone. And by someone I mean all 3 of his kids.
Question how do you confuse food for your kids. Your not that stupid. By the way being stupid is not an excuse. The stupidity has to be enjoyable to watch and....yeah he just killed his 3 kids with his stupidity how enjoyable do you think it was to watch that. And Peter just blows it off like it's no big deal. Yep killing someone, let alone killing your childrean is no big deal. Ha Ha funny Right................................................NO, NO,NO,NO,NO,NO,NO,NO,NO,NO
To be fair the kids do show up later in the episode. So this scene was pointless and non-canon i guess. Still a dumb joke either way.
Lois returns home after a long day at work and Peter begins acting like a stereotypical house wife. Tip-Taking one Gender Stereotype and putting it on the other gender is not funny. It's still a stereotype and while stereotypes can be funny just useing one is not. No matter which gender it's on.
We finally get to the main plot. God, it's about time. There was so much pointless filler.
Lois wants to have...uh...uhm...oh come on Evan you can say it. Just man up and say it....uh...Sex.
Lois wants to have...sex with peter. A problem occurs though(see what i did there) as it seems Peter can't get an erection.
The family makes fun of him fir it the next day and Chris even says he's a disgrace as a man and a father because of it. I would be ticked off but Peter is a disgrace as a man and a father. Not because of the whole erectile dysfunction thing but because of the other stuff we've seen and will see when I do more Family Guy episodes.
Peter is taken to the doctors and we get a stupid gag where the doctor dresses like a girl to try and turn Peter on. Worst.....doctor......ever.
Lois ask for viagra but apparently the doctor(can't spell his name) has been given them out as Anti-Depressiants (refer to above comment)
Even after the medicine Peter apparently still can't get an erection. That's what he tells his friends at the bar anyway. Quamire and Joe decide to see if they can help Peter.
What's their first idea. Have a Boston stereotype yell at Peter's penis (*tiny giggle*) until he has an erection.
You already know my thoughts on stereotypes. This is just......dumb. Straight up dumb.
Needless to say it doesn't work.
Next idea is to hook Peter's penis to wires when he has....sex with Lois next and have Quagmire as a puppet master controlling it.
What?
So we get a scene of Quagmire being the puppet master of Peter's penis. It wasn't funny to begin with but it gets less funny and more annoying as it drags out. END YOUR GOD DANG JOKES FOR CRYING OUT LOUD.
It doesn't work again so the boys cone up with a new plan. Peter didn't have this problem before he got fired so they decide they need to get his job back.
They go there and begin to talk to Peter's boss(Angela, i think. If i'm wrong i apologize)
Either way they don't even need to talk as Peter has a coupon. What is it for. Well apparently Angela gave it to him as a gift for a holiday. I don't care what the holiday is but either way the coupon allows him to get his job back. No joke.
1.This was never mentioned before. The writers got lazy and so they pulled this plot device out of their buttocks.
2. Why didn't you use it earlier. I mean you could've used it when your family was poor and could barely make a proper breakfast. So why didn't you use it before. All i can assume is that you were lazy. You rather slack about than do work to support your family. The old Peter Griffin would put his family first and try his hardest to get his job back. Peter what happened. Seriously what. You've turned into human scum. An animated piece of crap. How. How did this happen. For those of you who think I'm overanalyzing this I'm just saying what the episode is telling me. It's telling me that Peter Griffin is a douche who give no craps about his family. Sure he's getting his job back now but thats not because he wanted to support his family. It was so he would get erections again.
3. If this is a joke it's mot funny nor entertaining.
Screw this ending. Screw it. Any likeability this episode had left was killed by the ending.
So Peter goes to the store to tell Lois he got his job back and can get erections. They then proceed to have....sex in the store on top of the pita bread.
My thoughts exactly man.
What can I say. This is the worst episode I've covered thus far. Its dumb, unfunny, unentertaining, obnoxious, and stupid.
Peter looks like a jerk at the end and speaking of the ending it suck. It's one of the worst endings I've ever seen. It's also a pretty bland episode as well. Lets not forget the whale scene. It perfectly covers 99% of my problems with the show. Guess that's why it's called Peter Problems.
Best Part-The 3 jokes that made me laugh. Yeah only 3 out of an entire episode filled with 'jokes'
Score-3/10
I have so many other bad episodes I want to review from this show. Here's a list of the one's I wanna tear apart the most.
Family Gay
Tales of The Third Grade Nothing
Next time though we'll be looking at a good show. A Magical show if you well.
Next Review-Friendship is Magic Part 1 and 2 (My Little Pony)
Other Future Reviews
The Sum of His Parts (Teen Titans)
Driven To Tears (Spingebob)
Peter Griffin Craps His Pants
Growing Up.
Disclaimer: I do not own or have anything to do with Family Guy. I only own the character Scooter and the Hooker. Heh, Heh All right!
A/N: I am going to try to make this in story format rather than play format like my other story. Flashbacks in the story will be indicated by #.
Peter Griffin Craps His Pants Big And Tall
The story begins with Meg window shopping for out fits that she will hopw make her popular. Brian is at her side.
Peter Griffin Craps His Pants Big And Tall
'Oh! I will never find a popular outfit. Now no guy will talk to me…not only that, but none of the popular people will even notice I am alive.' Meg said. 'I don't see what the big deal is about being popular. When I was in school I made it along just fine, or I think it went that way…#(at this moment, Brian had a flashback). Jefferson High-1967...'Hey Brian, looking good (take a puff).' 'Ya, man, [chuckles then vomits] last night was great, but don't you care about not being popular?' '[in a drunken state] Ya…uhh…whatever. [faints]' 'Never mind.' said Brian. Meg replies 'Well, maybe it doesn't matter to you , but it matters to me. [Meg starts crying] School has changed since you went. Just leave me alone, I am going home.' As Meg leaves she glances over at the video store and sees a really cute boy who winks at her.
The scene fades out of the mall into Meg's room. Lois is at her door trying to calm her down.
'Meg, honey. Could you please let me in? I just want to talk. You know, when you talk about stuff it helps. Trust me, when your father and I talk, well actually it is just me talking, but that's now the point. The point is I can tell him anything and he usually listens whenever he is not watching TV. or drunk. Please tell me what is wrong.' Meg unlocks her door and in tears she says, ' What is there to tell…I am ugly and unpopular! Nobody likes me! I can't even get a decent gut to talk to me. Although I did see this really cute guy wink at me from the video store in the mall earlier.' 'Well, well, well, it looks like my little Meg has her eye on a guy. Just don't go getting any ideas and doing something you are going to regret and if you ever need to ask me or your father anything, don't forget that we are there for you.' 'Thanks mom, I love you.' Just then Peter walks in and says, 'Uh…did I miss something? Ummm…You know what, I am gonna go, this looks like one of those chick moments.'
[scene cuts to Meg at the mall the next day. She has brought Stewie along because she was forced to] 'Come on Stewie, I need to buy a purse.' 'Oh what the hell! I am going to kill Lois for making me be in your presence! Huh…are you listening? [slaps Meg] What the devil are you looking at?' All of a sudden some teenage guy walked up to Meg and asked, 'Are you Meg Griffin?' 'Ca…can I help you?' stutters Meg. 'Yes you can, my name is Scooter. You do know w who I am right…I sit all the way in the back of our history class.' Meg then replies, 'Oh yeah. Now I remember. Everyone used to make fun of you because of your name, but I like it. Scooter is such a…creative name.' 'Right. So you wanna go get some ice cream or something sometime? Actually, how about now?' 'I'd love to, except I have to take Stewie home. Tomorrow I will though, how about we meet here at noon?' 'Ok, then see you tomorrow.' Stewie then butts in to say, 'It's about god damn time woman! I mean seriously, all you women want to do is talk to guys. Now get me home and change me before I get a rash and also get sick from my own fumes because I soiled myself. Oh by the way, this is for you. [Stewie's face turns red and he craps even more in his pants.] CHANGE ME NOW!'
(Scene cuts to the Griffin house)
Lois is finishing changing Stewie when Meg walks in all excited and sys. 'Mom, guess what. I just met this great guy. His name is Scooter and he is so dreamy. I can't stop thinking about him.' 'Good for you, honey. Now just because his name is Scooter, doesn't mean you can ride him. Ha ha ha.' 'Mom…what did you mean by that. Are you trying to tell me that I can't see him anymore.' Lois then begins to explain the 'talk' that every parent fears. 'Well, honey…how should I say this? Well…I think I should get your father to help. PETER!' After hearing Lois, Peter goes to see why he was pulled away from his favorite episode of Beer Boy: The Tomb of the Lost Beer. He gets up the stairs and says, 'What now? I just opened my bottle of beer and was just about to watch my favorite episode of Beer Boy: The Tomb of the Lost Beer.' Lois sighs and says, 'Well Peter…our daughter is ready to have the talk!' Peter tried to run, but Lois made him stay. So then Peter said, 'Holy Shit, not again…didn't we already give her that talk? #Peter is on the street extremely drunk talking to some hooker who he thinks is Meg. ' So, uh…Meg, when a mommy Peter loves a daddy Lois they…[vomits then faints].' The hooker then says, ' I do not know of this Meg you are speaking of. Oh and you mixed up the order you fat ass drunk.'# Peter realizes he was wrong and says, 'Sorry Lois, I thought that was Meg. Oh well…anyways Meg, when a mommy loves a daddy very much and the want to make a baby like Stewie for example…' Peter was then cut off be none other than Stewie walking in and asking, ' What the bloody hell are you filling this poor girls head with?' Lois says, 'Stewie, sweetie, can you leave us alone? We are giving your sister a very important talk right now.' Stewie screams, 'AHH, AHH. Shut your goddamn mouth. My bloody ears are bleeding.' Stewie runs out screaming and slams head first into Chris. Chris laughs and says, 'What' wrong with you little man.' Stewie then threatens Chris and replies, 'Get your filthy hands off of me before I cut them off! Who knows where they have been…probably down your pants, no doubt.' Chris goes downstairs and then Brian walks over to Stewie and says, 'Peter giving Meg or Chris the talk again?' 'Oh, look, if it isn't nature's flea magnet, Brian. How are you? Pissed on any carpets or lawns lately? Anyways, yes. The fat bastard is trying to fill Meg's head with lies about babies.' Brian laughs, 'Actually little man, if you know what I mean, [Stewie gives Brian an evil look] all that stuff the big man is saying is true, Every word of that will happen to you too someday.' Stewie's jaw drops and he craps his pants. He just stands there in shock until it became awkward and Brian says, 'Yep…I am gonna go now…have fun.' There was an awkward silence and the scene faded black.
Peter Griffin Poops His Pants
A/N: I will update soon, but I would appreciate it if you reviewed it to tell me if I should do more or you could give me some tips.